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Practical Skills

The Plus Sign Sex Position: How to Align and Support

A crosswise lying position where one partner rests sideways and the other crosses over at a right angle — here's how to test the alignment first, adjust legs and support, and read what your bodies say.

Published August 24, 20267 cited sourcesHow this content is made

How to try it

1. Test the shape before anything else

Get into the geometry before any penetration: one partner lies on their side, the other lies across at a right angle, legs resting over the sideways partner's hips.

Stay there for a moment and ask one simple question — can we hold this shape without strain? If legs won't rest, hips won't line up, or you slide apart the moment anyone moves, that is useful information: this position may not fit your body combination.

Unwrapping into plain side-lying is a normal outcome, not a failure you need to fix.

2. Start small and slow — for one reason only

Begin with small, slow movements. The reason is mechanical: small movements keep the crosswise alignment intact, make re-positioning easier, and leave room to notice feedback — it is not a technique for lasting longer.

3. Treat leg placement as the first dial

How far apart the legs sit, how much the knee bends, and the angle at the hip each change what this position does — for both of you.

Change one thing at a time, then re-check alignment and support before touching the next variable: these two groups move together more often than not.

With space between the legs, the partner lying down may still be able to use a hand or a small vibrator; whether to add that is up to both of you.

4. Pick support from a spectrum, not two options

Propping on an elbow shifts more load toward shoulders and arms; staying lying down spreads it differently.

Between those, a forearm or hand on the mattress, a pillow under the hip or knee, or bracing against a wall or headboard are all common choices — no study has ranked them, so let your shoulder, lower back, and hip decide, and switch when one position tires.

5. Unwrap to adjust, not through pain

When the alignment slips or anything pulls, unwrap the legs first, settle back into place, and re-enter or switch positions. Adjusting in the middle is part of how this position works, not an interruption of it.

What you notice, and what to do

When they respond this way, here's what you can do.

Keep-going signals: the shape stays put, no pulling anywhere, breathing stays easy

Keep your current settings — leg position, support, amplitude — and keep movements small enough to preserve the alignment.

Keep checking in. Steady doesn't mean finished checking.

Adjust signals: pulling at the hip, pressure on the knee, a building back ache, alignment slipping

Treat these as cues worth watching, not reliable instruments — they can arrive late, or point to more than one cause.

Change one variable (legs, support, or amplitude), then re-check the shape. If you can't tell what's wrong, pause and ask rather than decode.

Stop signals: sharp pain, numbness, the shape losing stability — or a partner going still, quiet, or stiff

Unwrap the legs and stop. Going still or stiffening can be freeze, not enjoyment — pause, check in, and let the position go if that's the answer.

Pain and numbness are stop signals in any position.

Safety notes

This position assumes consent and the ability to pause: either of you can stop at any point, and unwrapping is always available.

Sharp pain, numbness, or the shape losing stability means stop — unwrap the legs rather than holding through it. Persistent pain during sex has its own guide (see related reading).

If hip mobility is limited, there's a hip implant history, chronic back or hip pain, a pregnancy where pressure on the belly is a concern, or a big difference in body size, legs-over-hip and wide hip angles may themselves be the problem rather than a dial to tune — choose a different position instead of pushing through.

Being crossed over can feel pinned. For some people, being held down or covered is a source of anxiety — say so beforehand, and treat stillness or quiet as a reason to pause and check, not a sign it's working.

Not wanting to try this, or trying it once and not liking it, is a complete outcome. No position is owed to anyone.

What you can say

Before trying

  • Want to test the shape first, before anything else?
  • If it doesn't hold, we unwrap and switch — no drama, okay?
  • Let's set a pause signal: tap me twice and we stop, no explanation needed.

While you're in it

  • How's your knee doing?
  • Want the pillow under your hip?
  • Elbow or lying flat — which is less tiring?
  • Feeling a pull? Let me move your leg.

Afterwards

  • Which leg position felt best?
  • Was the support worth it, or just tiring?
  • Something to change next time — or is this one not for us?

Common misconceptions about this position

Myth

Squeezing the legs tighter makes it better for everyone.

Fact

Tightness some partners report is a subjective sensation, not an anatomical rule.

Treat how close the legs sit as a dial to try — closer, further apart — one change at a time, and let feedback decide.

Why it matters

Chasing tightness pushes the receiving partner into hip strain and treats their comfort as secondary to a promised effect.

Myth

This position goes deeper, so it's better.

Fact

Depth isn't a goal, and it doesn't guarantee anything. In a U.S. probability survey, only about 18% of women said vaginal intercourse alone was enough for orgasm, and about seven in ten said clitoral stimulation was necessary or made orgasm better.

That is population statistics, not a verdict on anyone — depth is still a pleasure source for some people. Adjust by hip comfort and feedback instead of by depth.

Why it matters

The "deeper = better" default turns discomfort into something to endure, and ignores where most women's orgasms actually come from.

Myth

Getting distracted helps you last longer — that's what this position is for.

Fact

Distraction isn't an ejaculation-control method, and this guide isn't a delay technique — the small, slow start exists to make re-aligning and reading feedback possible.

If finishing too soon is the concern, pacing and pause practice are the direct route (see related reading).

Why it matters

Using distraction as control builds performance anxiety and avoids building the actual skill.

Sources

No study has measured this specific crosswise geometry — the position-specific claims you'll find online aren't evidence. What's cited below is the general research on how sexual positions change physical load, plus survey research on where women's orgasms actually come from. It supports the general principles here, not promises about this position.

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